Emphasis on ‘A’
Then, for the first time really ever, I dated. I dated a guy, the emphasis on ’A’ and like usual, some bitch had gotten to him first and he was more Roadkill than anything else.
We did the date thing for whatever and I had, had my diagnosis of my AVM and didn’t know what life and treatment would bring, but I had hopes I meant something to him, more than nothing.
After a third date that was more about us being ‘friends’ and watching films at my house (because my house had a heater and a cat!) etc.
*Sidebar; Imagine watching ‘Blue Dress’ with a new boyfriend, awkward!
So, I set about solving the boyfriend’s issues, trying to be a supportive girlfriend, hoping he would do the same with my treatment and recovery.
Let’s do a stocktake: –
- Alcoholic – fixed that. 🗸
- Separated, not divorced. 🗸
- Permanent Resident in Australia. 🗸
- Support him parenting his daughter. 🗸
This is starting to sound really bitter, which I’m not. In reality, he had his plans and I had mine and his did not include me.
It wasn’t until after we broke up and he was moving out to interstate for work that I learnt his mother did not even know I existed.
So, lesson learned.
If he had loved me, he would have still been here, with me and lord love that child, but not being a co-parent with the family make-up of that family, I dodged a bullet. Really!
I would have given it a red-hot go but I’m lucky I didn’t have too.
Hell onWheels/Life One Handed 
It sucks knowing that you were simply a stepping stone to something better. I’ve been there, too, and came to the same conclusion: Better to dodge that bullet before he owned half of everything.
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Ironically,I could have been able to take half of his. But what’s the point? Cheers,H
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That was mean of him to use you like that Helen. Thank God you did dodge that bullet!
I once let a lover stay for a week with me – in MY apartment. He paid nothing towards rent, electricity, heating, or food except bringing his own meat just for himself. He also ran up a debt with my phone calling his wife every night while I was working! I had a bad feeling with him from the beginning. So I told him to hand over his passport because we didn’t really know each other after 2 weeks. I used it for insurance in case he robbed me. He didn’t realise I had an itemised phone bill seeing all his expensive calls. And I was reluctant to let him in my space (no one else had lived there ever in the 3 years I was there – just me and my small dog, Sugar). But he told me as he was away from home working he needed somewhere desperately for a couple of nights.
Well, I texted him right away when I discovered the phone bill, saying he had to collect his stuff including his special East German Thuringen meat. At once! I made a pile of his bag, clothes, toothpaste and unopened meat.
He didn’t come at once.
He turned up 4 days later and the meat was truly off by then (the fresh kind). He tried denying his wife and children and I said I’m not stupid I saw the phone calls. He tried to change my mind about him staying. I said get out now or I call the police.
And off he tootled with the stale meat. I didn’t bother telling him that wasn’t fresh any more.
Love ‘n’ Cheers xox
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