Who is old enough to remember a great joke from the 90’s about Lawyers

Published August 25, 2025 by helentastic67

Joke goes like this “What do you call 100 lawyers at the bottom of the ocean?”

Answer: A bloody good start.

I offer you the modern version. “What do you call 100 real estate agents at the bottom of the ocean?”

Think you have this from here?

What kind of scumbag sells a forever home to someone who has disabilities advising them falsely on how easy they can access things like I don’t know, a car space, power to a mobility scooter and not tell them of impending costs and increase in fees?

Did I mention we are up for a new lift in 2026? Annoyingly, the lift has been a major annoyance this year, often being out of action for days, sometimes only hours. One particular Friday, I left to go shopping and my phone blew up as the building group chat had so many messages about the lift being out. I had to right leg it up the stairs upon returning from shopping with a carer on her first day with me.

A few strangers, neighbours in the building had come out to help carry my shopping upstairs and for that I was very grateful, but alas, being in a building with only one lift was something that was an afterthought, in the end once I found the right location, number of bedrooms and within a budget, I could cope with.

Thanks dad! Love you, Dad. Don’t hate me because my father loved me.

Jokes and Things

Published June 3, 2024 by helentastic67

Jokes and Things

My family, two sisters, their partners and I have a group chat like many families do, currently the chat is thick and fast due to the process and impending deadline of emptying our father’s home to sell. Yeah, it’s that’s time already.

I’ve obviously not been there much at all and it’s a few hours away plus I don’t drive, if anyone was wondering? I knew my older sister was going to be there this week to arrange real estate, etc for selling, styling, emptying. Etc.

Just want to remind people, I found a home for the weird and prolific meerkats that were hidden around the living spaces. That was a feat, but I actually rehomed them to a young carer I had while I’d been there. OMG they made her so happy, well pleased.

Now that I think about it, I should have hidden one behind a bush in the garden as a momento to see if anyone noticed.

So, I digress, my sister’s long road trip and imminent arrival, she messaged that she could pick up coffees for my younger sister’s partner, then by extension, my younger sister as they have been living there and my sister was working from home this particular day as the internet and phones were down at her work. It’s context and necessary. Coffee orders settled, and there’s nothing like being excluded by not being included. I know I wasn’t there, but thought I’d humorously add my presence, I wrote “I’ll get my coffee!” You know when you know they won’t appreciate your humour. I added, “My carer just laughed!” Nothing! Just dead air!

It’s always worth a try right.

Finding Happy Memories

Published January 23, 2023 by helentastic67

Finding Happy Memories

The younger generation miss out on a lot, particularly when it comes to inappropriate jokes, political correctness aside, and the older generation will love this and maybe remember them, because I’ve not had kids and because I feel like there’s a bit of a gap between the young kids today. I’ve not had kids to pass on some of the on the border of inappropriate jokes, see if you can cope with these trying to find something upbeat, OK it was a series of fat and skinny jokes and I could think of only one.

I shared this with someone today. Here we go fat and skinny had a bath fat pulled the plug glug, glug, glug!

Simple but elegant, in its simplicity. Shared it with a friend who didn’t know that one but had another in the Fat and Skinny collection.

Fat and skinny went to bed, Fat rolled over skinny was dead, sometimes simple things are quite witty are so good. Oh yeah, tell me what you think.

Remember I’m trying to find some happy memories from my youth to find a way through my grief.

A Little Variety

Published July 26, 2021 by helentastic67

A Little Variety

Because we all need a bit if variety, and because sometimes we need a little light and shade. Do you remember jokes from your childhood that seem to have been lost?