What Next?

Published July 11, 2016 by helentastic67

Attitude with lbp

What Next?

So, after diagnosis, you generally go through a stage of research and asking plenty of questions and travel to see different people and in my case getting a new job!

I recall reading a blog post of a guy in Sydney.

Because the arm is a potential for a stroke, aneurysm or plenty of other things one post comes to mind. This guy in Sydney wondered if he should be wearing a bike helmet around the house to protect his head or bear-down when going to the toilet.

You can appreciate how this stayed in my mind.

I think the first serious thing I did do was I stopped taking blood thinners (because after 20 years somehow it would make a difference?) So, no Naprogesic, those ‘Special blue pills’ that stop us killing men every month!

Was not happy!

To be clear, I DID NOT COME UP WITH THAT TERM, BUT I WISH I DID!

I recall one day at work surrounded by women and this one, an older woman asked me if I was okay.

They were aware I had my period at the time and had mentioned I was going to work quietly at my desk without moving around too much.

Ironically, I remember my response to her very clearly.

I indicated my belly button with my hand and stated I was fine from there down but my head was swimming!

So, no more blood thinners!

Santa

Published July 1, 2016 by helentastic67

Kris Kringle

Santa!

I’ve been asking people this month what they get from Santa?

I’ve only really got another week of this to go I think, anything past January might be pushing my luck, but generally the reaction I get is an odd look that tells me I’m being nosy and they don’t know why I’m asking. So I explain…

If you tell me what Santa gave you, I can judge if it’s a good present or a rubbish present. Yes, I’m a good judge of this! And of course, if you got a crap present then that tells me Santa thought you weren’t good last year!

Present is always a drama in our family. A few years ago we gave into my older sister’s insistence to do a Kris Kringle, so we only need to get one gift.

I love buying gifts, however cash strapped Santa is a bit of a mood-kill!

Christmas for me becomes the time I can ‘ask’ for the things I didn’t get for my birthday. And in recent years it’s been a way family could get things for me that I needed. Underwear! Yes! I know! It happened! The worst gifts at Christmas are jocks, socks and handkerchiefs! Unless you get Thunderpants!

They just make me so very happy!

Thunderpants

Check them out at http://www.thunderpants.co.nz

This year I also bought myself the two books I always hope for that are purposely released in time for the gift giving season.

Whatever Jamie Oliver’s latest cook book is and whatever new Patricia Cornwall book is also in stores.

I don’t read the novels anymore. With my eyesight it hurts to read but because of how organised I am, it hurts my pocket some to bury them but would hurt my brain more to thinking my bookcase is incomplete.

Bookcase 1

*Note – the books that are note spire facing out are the ones I’ve not read. So it’s how I can tell I’ve not read them.

P.S. Keep in mind I don’t wrap presents anymore it’s rather disappointing results when you have to gift wrap one-handed! But, I sent gifts home a few weeks earlier and they never got wrapped! Then, I had to remind them “Where were they?”

What did I do last year that was so bad?

Priorities

Published May 18, 2016 by helentastic67

Helens artwork Priorities!

So, these days I use a walking stick when I’m out of the house. There is a term for this. I am Ambulant!

And for those who are unfamiliar, I live in Melbourne Australia. Melbourne weather is known to be very erratic. I think crowded house was singing about Melbourne when they sang of ‘Four Seasons in one day!’

During the winter months, it helps to layer up with clothes because being Ambulant you really need to prioritise.

Walking stick or umbrella?

I sometimes after 8 years get a look of concern from the same people asking me if I have an umbrella.

Here is pretty easy, the answer is I GET WET…

The next one I think is pretty easy also.

Once a month I go to a committee meeting for a self-advocacy group I belong to. I cruise through Degreaves Street and pick up a coffee (medicine) to get me through the meetings.

So walking stick or Keep cup?

KEEP CUP!

Without my ‘medicine’ I don’t make it through those meetings. I often get a migraine just walking through the door and with a room full of people with an assortment of Brain Injuries I generally want to blow my brains out, pretty quickly…

Decisions

Published March 23, 2016 by helentastic67

decisions_mid[1]

Decision

To make a decision, I was given the mantra in my teenage years that if you couldn’t make a decision for yourself, the decision would be made for you and you may not always like the results.

The funny thing about being depressed is you might struggle to make even the most simplest of decisions.

Some people just on observation, get stuck in their own ‘shit’ so much they can’t make a decision to save themselves.

Start with small decisions, things you have to attend to everyday. Then build up to the bigger, harder stuff. If you have serious chronic Medical conditions, make a damn decision. If there are options to try to improve those conditions that will give you the possibility to return life to some form of normalcy try them!

Wait: TRY THEM!!!

You don’t know, if you don’t try them.

Sometimes, making a decision can snowball and if you can fix the things that have held you back some of the other problems are easier to deal with.

Depression can lesson and life can be easier and happier.

The Worst

Published March 17, 2016 by helentastic67

The worst 3

The Worst!

Think I worked it out!

Haven’t ‘unpacked’ my whole story for you yet, but people often need to compete “my disability is worse than yours……”

I may have mentioned or not, but I always say, all disabilities SUCK!

Just in different ways. And it’s not a competition, but today I found a young lady on the tram in “my seat” and she had a black Labrador tucked in between her legs.

So, the answer is ….. The worst disability is sitting opposite said cute black lab and knowing I can’t pat it!

If you don’t know, the rule is, if a guide dog has it collar on – it’s working and shouldn’t be touched.

And it’s the worst because they are so cute and I just want to hug them and squeeze them and love them!

And I’m a cat-person…

The end…

Christmas!!!

Published March 14, 2016 by helentastic67

Christmas lights 1

Christmas!!!

So our Christmas lights have several settings. My sister the lighting tech support recently described one of the settings as the Epileptic Fit Setting.

I’m really lucky I’ve NEVER had an Epileptic fit!

At least not a Clonic Tonic (Grand Mal) seizure.

I have things that give me a migraine, but no epilepsy. Not complaining……just saying.

I once had an appointment with a room full of Neuro type specialists and they couldn’t believe I’d never had a fit considering the size and location of my AVM.

I told the Doctors I had been to my share of dubs and dance parties back in the day and stared at enough strobe lights.

Consider this as a silver lining.

I’ve never had an epileptic fit!

Held Hostage

Published March 11, 2016 by helentastic67

Ginger Cat 1

Once upon a time our family had a cat which had kittens. There was a Ginger cat which was called “Ginger Biscuit”. It very briefly had a rather wry misname of ‘Crumb’ when Mum baked out of the drive way and it didn’t get out of the way. It sustained a broken leg and after a very expensive trip to the vets, came home with a metal rod in its leg. He survived to sun bath on our concrete for his vitamin D, but alas that’s just background. The temperament of this particular cat was really sweet. I once picked him up and sat with him on the couch. At the start he didn’t much go for my need to sit with him on the couch, so I had to hold him to my chest with both arms. Poor Biscuit didn’t have a chance really, however luckily within 2-4 minutes he was touched in and fast asleep purring…

There is something about having a disability and being taken away from your home where you can maintain some of your own independence that is like being held hostage.

When at home, I can pretty much fend for myself. I don’t leave the house every day of the week if I can help it and I prefer to have the help of a carer on the days I do leave the house, but when I’m out of my comfort zone I have to rely on the volunteer assistance from family or friends. I cannot do my own hair, trim my own fingernails or toenails or dry and dress in a timely manner and endeavour. Eventually, like Ginger Biscuit I just accept fate and take what I can get, make the most of it and go to sleep.

And this plays on the depression.

If you think it’s a 1^st world problem that I can’t do my own mani/pedi, I should be so lucky! My nails are soft these days and bend back causing pain, my left toenails if too long get stubbed and badly damaged. My left fingernails get in the way when I’m trying to exercise that hand and keep my fingers flexible. So, yes? My fingernails are an issue. But if you want a stronger example: try this.

Met a woman from the Barwon District, who had come to tell us of her experiences of the NDIS being piloted in her region.

She was in a wheelchair and probably in her late 40’s – early 50’s. She had a package to provide her carers and as she needed a Carer to go from bed to her wheelchair where she spent her day and to a toilet and back to her chair or bed, you might like to imagine the timing of her carers could be rather critical.

She gave the example that one particular day, she couldn’t wait to go to the toilet and her carer was some hours away, so she rang her service providers to request her carer earlier.

They could not provide it to her.

As she sat in her chair on the stage, she told us she couldn’t wait and in the best of spirits announced to us that when her carer did arrive at the rostered time she would have more of a mess to clean up!

Now, I’ve had some “shitty days!” But she was so brave to announce it to us like that and can you imagine it’s a way some people get held hostage to a situation far from their control…

Social Isolation

Published March 8, 2016 by helentastic67

Social Isolation

Sometimes, I try to socially engage with people wherever I go. I do this at the places I go for appointments or the supermarket for groceries. No lifetime friendships, but connecting all the same because it’s how I encourage people to get to know me and see that I’m “Normal!”

At my local supermarket, my favourite checkout chicks have gotten to know me over the years. Even from before my disability.

On Friday, I encountered a newish guy in the Deli/Freezer area. He was restocking the dairy case with milk.

Now, for those who don’t know – Melbourne has had a heatwave the last few days and being in the freezer section of the supermarket is the place to be.

This is the perfect example of how I try to engage with people and retain my sass!

This guy was wearing a big jacket to wear into the cool room. I asked if that jacket was really necessary in this weather.

He tells me it’s for when he’s in the cool room.

I inquire, “What’s a girl gotta do to get in that cool room? He didn’t really reply.

I grabbed my cream and as I moved away I told him,

“I wasn’t trying to sexually harass him in the work place”

I saw he had a big grin on his face and I did a circular motion towards his smile and told him “I was going for that!”

Jamima

Published February 29, 2016 by helentastic67

Jamima

Meet Jamima ‘Patch the Pirate Cat’ Puddleduck!
So called for my patchy left eye & my pen chance for sitting on shoulders(until Uncle B comes along, his shoulder h helps me get higher)
I’m the mental Healthcare Provider for a Crazy Cat-Lady. Housemates, boyfriends & even Uncle B have come & gone but my Mum keeps up with the Tuesday Tummy Rub’s!

Stay Tuned……….

Things to Miss: Fred!

Published February 19, 2016 by helentastic67

Things to miss 3

There are many things I miss from the era before I developed my disability and I’m not referring to the stuff you would miss because you can no longer do them, because sooner or later you can’t go clubbing all night and not feel like crap the next day even if you don’t drink. That shit happens because you have gotten older and I miss feeling like a valued member of society. I miss intellectual conversations with people.

Once upon a time, I worked for an N.G.O. as I will have mentioned and a supervisor came to me with a problem. I gave him the answer, he didn’t want. That was “NO!” Then he had a follow up question to circumvent the first answer. To which he got a further answer of “Yes, but NO!” then for safe keeping I answered his next 4 questions; something like this “Yes, no, no, no, yes, no!” I know I could tell you the scenario to help you better understand and while it was 10 years ago, I no-longer recall the clients name but let’s call him Fred!(was definitely not Fred) but recall the situation perfectly, it’s not going to help you to bore you with all the details.

His response to my answers was “What was that for?” And I told him they were the answers to his next 4 questions because I knew exactly where he was going with his line of questioning. The moral of the story was Fred had been lax in starting his obligation. He could not come back as a new referral for the outstanding hours he had missed before his contract ended. He could come back for a whole new obligation before he would be eligible for the allocated funding to go toward studies & further training. Hope you can tell from this that I knew my stuff, despite the terminology I’ve just used. (Obligation/contract,etc)

I do miss those days. I miss having people respect my knowledge and think to ask me for my wisdom.

FYI: My mum hates it when I do this even though I think it slightly amuses her…That is to predict her questions and answer them before she has had a chance to ask.