
Birthday Sucked as Predicted
As predicted this year’s birthday was less than spectacular. I need you to know how terrible it will actually be every year but know I will be underwhelmed. The terrible started the day before on the Tuesday, my birthday landing this year on a Wednesday. I had the first meeting for my local councils new DAC. (Disability Advisory Committee.) You know it’s not called that now; I don’t know what it will be called. But some years ago, in the last thirteen years I think I’ve been attached to the group they decided to break down all the fun accessibility words like Access and Inclusion, Cultural Diversity, Indigenous and the other things into separate groups. Because it always helps to create a safe place for these groups individually and when you expect them to get long out in the real world, do I need to finish this train of thought.

So, I was all about to go out to this meeting when breakfast decided to come out the same way it went in. I’m all about the graphic description today, so strap in.

I cancelled my taxi, took off my shoes and my AFO and called it. I went back to bed; I call this a late scratching. I attempted to have a protein shake later in the day and that went badly also. Both ends. That’s my attempt at being a little more diplomatic. You’re welcome.

By 9pm I actually rang one of my carer providers to see if I could have a carer. I was lucky to get a carer, who while new to me came and stayed with me for a few hours.

Seems the perfect time to use the best quote from the film Bridesmaids
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bridesmaids_(2011_film)
If you are not familiar, you just got homework and the best quote ever from this film is “Oh my God! It’s pouring out of me like hot lava!”

My birthday I managed to finish the hydrolyte I started early in the morning. My carer was dispatched to do a few things; I managed a shower in the late afternoon.

A text from an older sister suggested even after stating how unwell I’d been still suggested I eat cake. My younger sister rang me late that night and we had a long call in which I cried.

Honestly, family is like death by a thousand tiny cuts. I did get out on the Thursday briefly for an appointment and a bit of hunter/gathering on the Friday. But it really took a week to bounce back.

A friend cheered me this week by pointing out a situation that would be worse than the two days I endured. Said friend has colonoscopy bags. Just so it helps to imagine. I thought this would make the “Hot Lava” situation easier? Until he suggested if the person who had to change the bag could not do so in time. You are so welcome.

Next time someone tells you their birthday sucks believe them. But always also be aware they know it could be worse.
