Soulmates

Published February 21, 2020 by helentastic67

Soulmates

Many years ago, when discussing soulmates with a female friend, back in our 20’s when one of us (ME) still believed in soul mates.

I remember throwing the idea around with her, where was this soulmate?

We decided and wholeheartedly agreed. He was lost.

I may have mentioned this?

I suggested, did he need a Melway’s?

It’s the thing on paper we used to navigate Melbourne before Google Maps.

Yes, someone pointed out Google Maps said friend replied. My soulmate needed an inter-galactic Melways.

What I have found in recent years is a few old club male friends I never thought to date, I only ever saw them as friends, have reached out and wanted to ‘catch-up’ with me. One of those even had a medical condition all his own he had dealt with. (Now, 10 years in remission).

The difference being, he had a partner to support him. He had children he could still work; he could even continue to study. He told me he understood my disability and to call on him anytime I needed something. Have I heard from him again? No don’t be ridiculous.

Apparently, I’ve met my soulmate, he just has yet to work out that, that soulmate is me.

To be continued…

Today’s Lunch – 19 February 2020

Published February 19, 2020 by helentastic67

Today’s Lunch

Good Mental Health Day
Well, I am in the middle of a crazy social week. Which is unusual, I don’t often have such a busy social existence but things kept getting moved around and it’s all happened or happening over the whole week.

Last Thursday I went to see Birds of Prey. With Margo Robbie. (She’s an Australian, just saying)

Then today, I saw another film with a different friend. This film I used a free ticket for giving one of my support agencies feedback, so we went and saw Jane Austin’s Emma.

And then I went to church! Well, not a real church but a place I consider my Temple. I love to browse; I don’t get to buy anything. But here are some beautiful pictures so you too can appreciate why I go. Even if I can’t afford to buy anything for have the room for more furniture. My red and white provincial doona cover is my summer pride and joy in my bedroom. It makes me so happy.

https://www.provincialhomeliving.com.au/

And again, keeping lunch simple. Today’s offering is a Mediterranean quiche with side salad and medicine!

Have a migraine today, so really need medicine!

No Regrets

Published February 17, 2020 by helentastic67

No Regrets

And that is how Ryan Gosling was ruined for me. Just Ruined.

What? Ryan Gosling (he is too young) and taken. But isn’t he the new Brad Pitt?

Oh, Brad Pitt is the new Brad Pitt since splitting from Angelina Jolie.

No, pass. Imagine co-parenting with that as your ex-partner.

Just NO.

I accept anyone I date now is going to have a past. Wise words from a gay guy friend of a gay friend is that:

This is the time relationships break up after twenty years and the guys come scratching around. I have a weird knee-jerk reaction to this, so if I didn’t want to date them way back then and they were interested in me back then, why didn’t I know about it? And did they just make do with whoever they have been with all this time?

Instead of me? Mmmmmm……….. more thought required.

I do know I don’t want to have regrets in life. I definitely don’t want to get to 65 and regret I didn’t make the effort to find him.

Who is he?

Where is he!

Emphasis On ‘A’

Published February 14, 2020 by helentastic67

Emphasis on ‘A’

Then, for the first time really ever, I dated. I dated a guy, the emphasis on ’A’ and like usual, some bitch had gotten to him first and he was more Roadkill than anything else.

We did the date thing for whatever and I had, had my diagnosis of my AVM and didn’t know what life and treatment would bring, but I had hopes I meant something to him, more than nothing.

After a third date that was more about us being ‘friends’ and watching films at my house (because my house had a heater and a cat!) etc.

*Sidebar; Imagine watching ‘Blue Dress’ with a new boyfriend, awkward!

So, I set about solving the boyfriend’s issues, trying to be a supportive girlfriend, hoping he would do the same with my treatment and recovery.

Let’s do a stocktake: –

Alcoholic – fixed that. 🗸
Separated, not divorced. 🗸
Permanent Resident in Australia. 🗸
Support him parenting his daughter. 🗸

This is starting to sound really bitter, which I’m not. In reality, he had his plans and I had mine and his did not include me.

It wasn’t until after we broke up and he was moving out to interstate for work that I learnt his mother did not even know I existed.

So, lesson learned.

If he had loved me, he would have still been here, with me and lord love that child, but not being a co-parent with the family make-up of that family, I dodged a bullet. Really!

I would have given it a red-hot go but I’m lucky I didn’t have too.

Today’s Lunch – 12th February 2020

Published February 12, 2020 by helentastic67

Today’s Lunch

Good Mental Health Day

This week, food made my first bread and butter pudding for 2020!

Also made homemade sausage rolls. They do not look as inviting, so here’s a picture Noelle has found. The sausage roll is as Aussie as our pies with sauce.

This was Monday’s lunch at home. The quintessential curried boiled egg with lettuce but on pocket bread. Soooo good.

So, hump day has arrived with a ‘Is this week over yet?’

And lunch! Today’s offering is an Azaffarini Arancini with side salad. (Saffron rice/peas and mint) and medicine.

For those curious? Most fires are out & now we have floods! Not kidding! Sydney is a giant swimming pool!

Cheers,
H

Let’s Be Friends

Published February 10, 2020 by helentastic67

Lets be Friends

So that is to say, when I was diagnosed, I did have a boyfriend. But all the boxes were ticked for it’s not a forever thing.

I’m a Nona, he wouldn’t let me feed him.
He would not sleep over (No, there was no sex) I’m fine with as he was not ‘fit’.

*Fit – The term I picked up from living with two British Geezers for a month, to describe someone as ‘Sexy’. They flicked through a magazine to point out all the pictures; “Fit! Fit! Fit! Not Fit!” Hilarious.

Fit

Not Fit

And we’re back.

And he was working, but had some crazy idea that he was the ‘Hero’ in every scenario. He had moved back home at 37. You get me, right?

Oh, good lord. Guys just have that deer in the headlight look, don’t they?

What are we doing? Is this working?

Fine! I’ll rip the band-aid off.

“Let’s be friends!”

We remained friends for some years, which was more what we had been anyway. But…..

And Next

Published February 7, 2020 by helentastic67

And Next

A few years back I went to my High School reunion (25 years) and one particular guy asked me these questions.

“Married?”
And my reply, short and sweet “No”
“Divorced?”
(in my head WFT) Again “No”
Then “Children?”
“What?” (again, in my head WFT) “No! Why?”

Now, I do not feel I’ve failed at life because I’ve not done any of those things. I have dated, not much dating. More meet a guy, spend time with said guy (No! Not bonk each other’s brains out) maybe a little, but the stuff you do to work at, if you want to be permanently attached to this person forever.

What? I am a hopeless romantic. I just am not willing to throw myself at every man out there to find a decent one.

Sidebar: Where the hell are the decent one’s by the way?

I digress, I’ve had relationships. Sure, they broke my heart. The others, I broke theirs, or they didn’t have a heart to break.

I have the mentality to not go back when a relationship is over. Alas, if it didn’t work the first time and the one’s that got away have never come back.

And NEXT.

Today’s Lunch – 5th February 2020

Published February 5, 2020 by helentastic67

Today’s Lunch

Good Mental Health Day

Despite the next month of foodie posts would have you believe I don’t go out for dinner very often. Saturday just gone I went out for dinner with some friends. They are actually closer friends of a friend who couldn’t make it. So, I went out with a really lovely couple.

Anyway, my neighbourhood has an abundance of gourmet pizza places and burger places. Both exe Saturday night we did Italian pizza. A place called I’l Pizziaolo. Translation, the pizza maker. I did get better taking photos after the first course. In photos it went like this: going with other friends in a few weeks and one of those friends is more Wog than I am. He will cope.

Late Saturday night having already eaten what I refer to as my standard, standard Saturday wog lunch followed by more Italian for dinner. An ache in my side made me think for days, days! I had eaten too much food from the same food group. That being Wog.

Monday, I greeted my carer with the question, what’s in here? (Pointing to my side) Then questioning, kidney, liver? Which internal organ is so pissed off with me? Alas, I think I found another reason why I do not do chilli and pepper. It hurts my internal organs. Still going there again, just can’t eat the home made traditional Italian salamis.

Meanwhile, back to the present. Today’s offering is, a bolognaise arancini with side salad and medicine.

Cheers,
H

Single Barren Spinster

Published February 3, 2020 by helentastic67

Single Barren Spinster

Australia has a comedienne called Kitty Flanagan. This is a great way to start this post. I’m going with it.

I read a brilliant article where she explains why she is reclaiming the title Single Barren Spinster. She explains in this article she planned to have children if the circumstances were right.

Partner/Husband/Significant other – Tick, tick, tick

Baby – Tick

https://www.smh.com.au/opinion/being-childfree-is-no-reason-to-keep-mum-20150108-12kcan.html

As she got older, the clock started ticking and she states she didn’t want to do it alone. The above seemed important to her.

Tick!
Tick!
Tick!

And I agree, I completely agree. In my teens, I thought by my late 20’s, I would have a husband, two children, my own interior decoration business, a retail outlet, holiday’s overseas, a house, etc.

Oh God! Teenagers are so naive, aren’t they? And now, alas I’m 46 years old (47 by the time this goes live, however) none of the above happened.

I quote Kitty Flanagan and being a Single Barren Spinster to any carer and they look at me for a moment. I tell them in the dictionary under ‘Single Barren Spinster’ is a picture of Kitty Flanagan.

Then there’s a picture of me.

Sleep Clinic – Part 2

Published January 31, 2020 by helentastic67

Sleep Clinic – Part 2

So, today I thought I’d do the FU (follow up) on my sleep clinic experience. Hilarious.

It’s been six months since my last confession. (no, I stand by that comment)

The goal since I was last there, was to improve my sleeping pattern, because I go to bed late (or early, depends how you look at it) and don’t want to wake in the morning.

And today, I reported I’m still struggling to get to bed/sleep by 1am. (I repeat 1am) But alas, it usually takes me that long to get to and from appointments, do chores, do the TV/Current Affairs catch-ups. Because, I still need to know what’s happening out there in the world and what stupid Tweets some ‘world leaders have said.’

WFT people! How has he still got a Twitter account? Why has somebody not taken it off him? (Don’t answer that)

Hey, I’m not saying our Prime Minister is a model citizen, but c’mon.

Anyway, I digress.

My original diagnosis after the sleep clinic was very mild sleep Apnoea. Don’t panic, I’m not worried. I was told to avoid sleeping on my back. No, really. That’s the solution to that.

Besides this I might have secondary Narcolepsy and I kept telling him I knew what that was because, I lived through the 90’s and saw My Own Private Idaho with River Phoenix (RIP) and Keanu Reeves (mmmmm) in it. We don’t even know if I have that until I fix/improve my sleeping pattern.

Today, I tried to Hel-splain (like Man-splain, but Helen does it) why improving my sleeping pattern is so near impossible.

It’s winter right now as I write this, so if I woke early, I’m going to get up/do what I have to do and go back to bed, because it’s warm there and sleep, because I’m still tired.
I’ve got crazy Bitch Hormones. I am sliding into the Pause (Menopause) so two weeks out of every month I am just knackered and the first week, I’ve forgotten why but let myself sleep in the afternoon if I just can’t stay awake and thing’s hurt and I can’t work out why.
Then there’s the Carpel tunnel. WFT is this bullshit. I’m back fast asleep for two hours and the pain in my right hand is excruciating. A cross between pins and needles and numbness. Pick a lane already. I change positions and stretch out my arm and hand. It hurts to touch the blankets and I can’t even make myself stretch my hand above my head to the top of the bedhead, put my fingers under the top of the timber to stretch my arm in all the right places to relieve the symptoms. So, I lie on my back with my arm flung out to the side, wriggling my fingers until the pain subsides.
Migraines for me are often daily occurrences. While not the normal type that send you to bed, or go to bed with the lights off and a bucket nearly, they are still really crappy. And I’d rather go to bed and sleep it off than get “pilled” and be bombed out. I could potentially medicate every day and who wants that?

And Z. I AM NOT A MORNING PERSON! Have you met me? My name is Helen. Some years ago, my mum told me I was born just in time for breakfast at 7.13am. Who the fuck has breakfast at 7.13am willingly? (don’t answer that) Mum also suggested, on my birthday to wake at that time and make a list of goals to achieve by the following birthday. Something of setting intentions or other, but seriously.

If I’m having breakfast at 7am in the morning, I’d be ready for dinner at 6pm and bed by 9pm. If I’m going to bed at 9pm, I’m ready for the Nursing Home.