family

All posts tagged family

Hot off the Press – 6th November 2017

Published November 7, 2017 by helentastic67

Hot off the press 0611

Hot off the Press

Why! Why! Why! Do I bother?

So, I realise in hindsight last week’s Hot post was very busy. And I guess it was accurate to my week and my weeks often are very busy. At the moment it seems there is no way to reduce the busy……….but I shall try.
Monday, head hurt. Saw my shrink. Had medicine. And lunch out.

Pork Rice Paper Rolls

Dealing with lowering my expectation of how much family will assist me to reduce my belongings. I will be downsizing, slightly and while I still have things I intended selling five years ago when I moved here, I have not realised the assistance I need so I can sell them. I have issues with expressing to family that I’ve lost so much already, I don’t want to just give away everything else. I thought at this point in life I would be married and have kids, (well, at least have that picture of a family in my existence) and it’s now less likely and far more challenging to foresee that image in my life. So, while stuff are just things, it’s harder to part with. Look! See how impossible it is? (to write a shorter post on a Monday?) I cannot shorten my life……….

Moving

Tuesday, despite the roadworks happening outside my front door! I had a massage at home. (You can’t make this crap up, seriously!) Went to my rehab specialist and a belated birthday gift! I got BOTOX! I my calf!

Botox

Sounds weird, right?

And it’s not even to take out the wrinkles? No. To help soften and stretch my calf muscles and stop my hyper extension and hopefully save me from needing a knee replacement in later life. Yeah, lazy day. Still knackered. Next!

More roadworks again Wednesday! God help me! I bet I move and then the long promised and long-awaited speed humps get installed down this street! I have a few hoons that like to Fang it down the street even though not far is a roundabout………

Roadworks

Normal Punchy/stubby Wednesday. Hope you saw my foodie post?

After a delay, I signed my lease today for my new home……and despite the law that will be soon to come in I am not allowed to get a cat YET! And no, I don’t know when I can. Bit grumpy.
Back to my old neighbourhood for a late birthday lunch with a friend Susanne… Here are some photos of the Red door corner store.

Red door 1red door 2red door 3red door 4

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Did my first visit to the bottle shop for some boxes. I like to make jokes about buying unopened boxes of brandy or such, drinking it all then recycling when I move but again, not a drinker. Made some calls to get the funding side of moving organised including an 8AM start with a carer next week and a day out with a carer to get stuff done. Keep smelling something weird today…….wondering if I’m having a stroke? I keep smelling pot (as in Mary Jane) again, I have never smoked it however my fav housemate used to…. Guess that’s why he was so chilled out, right?

smell weed

Friday! Meant to get some serious laundry done for the next week, sine I will soon be living without a close. Line? WTF! (Sorry, I know some of you are not fans of potty mouths) I just don’t get how I’m going to get queen sized sheets dry living in an apartment with a tiny, tiny balcony. Didn’t get much done at all today for the big move! Booked my trucks…….my little red Trucks. They have moved me the last two times. Ending the week feeling like I’m getting a cold or something. I don’t like it.

Happy Off-grid Saturday. Put on a Toppy film while I started packing some lighter things.
Sunday, more packing, but lazy day until the evening when I Again did something unusual…..I went OUT!

I seldom go out in the evenings anymore. Going to see a band a rarity. But last night I went to see a Melbourne band from the 90’s called Snog! (No, really) Let me just say they are heavily sample-based and once you hear a few of their lyrics you will not forget.

Dave Thrussel came out onstage wearing a gold suit and a seriously hideous Donald Trump mask. The woman had come out on stage wearing frog masks and the dude at the back was wearing a gimp mask! (We were all later accused of being guilty at taking a glance at his crotch) I promise, I didn’t, because I couldn’t really see that far. The Trump mask made much more sense when he started with one of our favourites………Corporate Slave…….(Alpha 66 Remix)

They also have another great track called Shop!……..

Keep in mind they will seem very dated. Online content has come a long way……..Snog is a very interesting listen. Enjoy.

Had a fun time getting to an accessible toilet at intermission. Really should have gone with my first instinct and followed the guy in the wheelchair. Crossed the venue twice following false information, before correctly being directed to the lift and upstairs. Yes! The guy in the Wheels had beaten us! As he should have. Ran into one of my club buddies from back in the day, D5 (there were too many Dave’s to keep track of so I numbered them!) he tapped me on the left shoulder…..I really must tell him I don’t feel much on that side. Ironically, he said it was great to see me out and about…….(I’m out and about most days, it’s the nights I just don’t often do anymore)

Afterwards we went to Coles where I argued with the self-serve checkout. (Don’t be so impatient!) where I bought juice. So, Rockstar! Arrived home just after midnight. My Renegade Tri Jacket got a compliment also and I was asked if people offer to buy it? (Never going to part with it) It’s one of those rare items from my clubbing/Street-wear days I can still wear. I just save it for the rare but good times. I think the highlight for me were being in a small band venue with a sound system that made the floor vibrate and sound like it could strip the paint off the walls. I miss those days and if only my pedometer on my smart phone could count wriggles……that’s my dance style these days. Ok, I gotta finish this at some point so it can go live. At least on the day it is intended. My bad, I’ve been busy…….please forgive. Stay tuned for next week.

Pedometer
Cheers,
H

Great week

Hot off the Press – 23rd October 2017

Published October 23, 2017 by helentastic67

Hot off the Press 2310

Hot off the Press

Monday! Such an early start when some SOB (scratch that) person! Rang my doorbell! I again presume my landlady who should be aware I could drop down and ring her doorbell at 2am when I go to bed and I won’t attempt to rush down her front stairs or if I did I could injure myself. Ah, I guess if I injure myself it’s their fault? Just checking.

Insurance? Ka-Ching! Not worth it but I’m having a little internal chuckle. Game on! So, cannot wait to move!

Adventure

Busy day, adventure to neighbouring suburb. On the povo-trail as I call it. (Povo, short for poverty)
I skipped my Osteo appointment so I could make sure I would be at my best to go see a property close by. It’s cheaper and has 2 bedrooms and 2 bathrooms! Ok, one less bedroom than here. No street view, backyard or grass anywhere, and a smaller balcony than my current backyard. But a potential home for my new cat? Warm in Melbourne, have I ever mentioned 25 is my happy place for warm weather? I am such an old lady remind me what happened to spring?

Poverty trail

Tuesday! Starting to get better with having breakfast before my carer every other week when I have my massage at home, after we went for coffee.
And…..
Oops! Did it again!

Almond CrossiantLatte

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Saw my GP, had lots on his list today. Turns out there is no test for diagnosing Thorasic Outlet Syndrome, it’s only a clinic diagnosis. So, I just need that in writing please so I can have NDIA to fund my Osteo, Mio/remedial needs Funding? Mmmmmmmm……. Caught a tram home, I got out part way to visit some shops (all walking distance.) Did some hunter/gathering and decided to walk home via a visit with Wilbur.

Sleeping

Oh, also had some time with this bit of fluff, Frankie whose dad told me he must really like me. Although this is Frankie ignoring me. His dad had gone inside to order and return with more doggy treats.

Frankie

Made it home in one piece with 5,300+ on my pedometer. So buggered didn’t help that it was rather warm today.

Wednesday, my standard Punchy/stubby day without the shabby part. My acupuncturist is away rubbing shoulders with political minds. Dropped in for a visit with Bella. No joy. Scootered home and dropped in for a visit with Matt, who has developed the 9 apartments down the street with his wife and friend. Shared some photos of cars. I don’t drive, but I like a nice car. Here are some photos of the car Matt had worked on earlier that day.

Austin1st Car

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

By the end of the day I networked and shared some photos of my uncle’s cars. He has restored.

2nd Car2nd Car 12nd Car 2

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Otherwise, just some nice photos of cars for you if that’s your thing. (It should not be imagined that I have money, am related to people with money, or have friends with money.) Just an appreciation for nice cars I will never drive.

Ah, must mention before I move on, at the start of the day I couldn’t feel my left foot and most of my left leg and side.  By about 2pm I could as it had started to hurt, stock standard day really. By the end of the day, ok almost Midnight, I’ve realised it’s almost the end of the year in the bigger scheme of things and I’m wondering if it’s normal I’ve only seen one family member all year! Thank God for my mum, right? I haven’t seen my two sisters or my father. I have two cousins in Melbourne. One of which I wouldn’t mind seeing at more than funerals. Again, is this weird?

Weird family

Have I mentioned, my home is so hot in the warmer months that I have to put anything that melts into the fridge. Chocolate, Nutella and now, coconut oil! It’s completely liquidified. It’s time to move!
Does anybody believe in the concept of ‘Timing?” This week marks the passing of me applying for my 4th apartment this year. And knowing I can’t give notice to vacate until I find my new home,because, I can’t just live in any flat, unit, apartment, whatever. I don’t drive, so can’t live miles away from transport or my (well, let’s not mince words: Clifton Hill and my fav cafe and stomping ground) and I can’t do stairs or a shower over the bath and electric stovetop, etc. etc. Today I found out I got a place and now I can give notice! I can even start stalking my next fur-baby, by Christmas!

Melting chocolate
Excited………………

Wow! That didn’t take long…… Life can’t let you be happy for a single God damn minute can it? Believing the Universe will look after things all goes to hell.

Welcome to my Friday, where I have mentioned the Wheels fell off! My replacement carer for my Homecare/shopping my only Foodie Prep shift cancelled sick. The agency didn’t have a replacement, I outsourced myself to my newest agency and was very lucky to get someone for only 2 hours towards the end of the day.

So, I pulled up my big-girl pants and got on Hellonwheels got a jaunt to the other supermarket I live in-between two major supermarkets. Near (it will be my milk bar when I move. Won’t even need my scooter) got half of my shopping list and on the way home stopped at my old real estate. Gave notice! Thinking I should have waited a few more days as the new apartment won’t be available until the 18th and I need a few days to arrange carpets and cleaning to be done before my notice is up here. Family politics doing my head in. Again, seriously thinking to spend Christmas at home alone. With my new fur-baby. No, haven’t gone to meet any new cats, just know I’ll be getting one ASAP!
Finishing the week feeling flat and sad.

Going shopping

Saturday. No medicine! Must be dying not to fit in a coffee!

No Coffee

Sunday, skipped lunch to squeeze in my medicine. Then had lunch for dinner, happy Sunday. Half a comic was read this week. Comics didn’t rate high on the priority list this week. I’ll catch up in a few to be sure.

Sunday

Have my NDIS review this week! I will finally have the meeting with an actual Planner about my “Goals” pity I didn’t get this meeting a year ago. I don’t know how they imagine I can find my way to knowing what my Goals might be when money is so tight. I would be happy to start with if they paid for my shoes, my chiropractor and my Shrink. As well as continue to pay for my carers……..so I can start to breathe a little. Then, maybe I can consider some Goals.
Another big week to come.

Goals
Cheers,
H

Happy week

Home

Published September 22, 2017 by helentastic67

Home

Home

Is where the heart is, right? My parents built the home I grew up in from the age of about 5. (better first check that)

My bedroom had a window on the side of the house so the only view I had was of a fence. When the men next door worked on their cars in the driveway after hours with the lights on, late into the evening.

The house was built in the 70’s and my parents never did any major renovations, so to this day the kitchen still has its orange (sorry, mum, Mordarine) bench tops, its brown cupboards and orange spaceship lights.

 

70's Kitchen

Space light

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

They seemed to make them to last back then, right? But anyway, I digress, I moved out of home and to Melbourne when I was 19 years old, to study. This is probably when it seemed to be my home. It was a base, sure and my teenager “stuff” remained here, but it wasn’t really my home any longer.

When I was about 23 years old, my parents finally divorced. I say ‘finally’ because from about 12 years old, I knew it was imminent.

In the late 90’s (me in my late 20’s) I lived with my mum and younger sister (then 13) for 2 years, but while her house feels like a home, it doesn’t feel like my home.

It definitely feels like their home and when my dad had a thing for moving “stuff” around inside his house, much of my important childhood “stuff” migrated to my mum’s.

Every rare visit to both my mum’s home and my childhood home brings up different emotional ‘traumas’!

A visit to my mum’s, some 3 ½ hours north from Melbourne, upon arrival, as soon as you open the car door, a whiff of fresh country air, with a subtle pine and burning wood fireplace smell takes me back and refreshes me.

Melb to Wangaratta

I was quite isolated and depressed when I lived there for 2 years.

But my dad’s house, doesn’t feel like a home. Over the 20 years, its felt like the ‘life’ left.

The good furniture is still there, the wall units in dark timber is still there, the timber chest in the billiard room that housed the stamp collection, the roll-timber desk and of course the beautiful pool table. (I call dibs)

Wall unit

Op shop finds have sprung up and taken root (or even stored) for some insane reason, where it’s not needed or used. Dad’s house seems strange, like time stood still, I got bigger, but ironically, when I’ve spent a rare night there as I did last October, when I went to my 25th High School Reunion. Kitchen cupboards, the laundry sliding door, they still sound the same. Like it’s been frozen in time.

My father did move on and found another relationship (weirdly with someone 20 years older) so he has kind of aged in a strange way, if you know what I mean. She has never taken up residence there and they maintain they are ‘friends’, although I suspect he has helped her financially.

Romantically mum never moved on and was busy being a single parent to my younger sister and didn’t make time to meet anybody.

While I’ve moved so many times in the last 25 years, my mum has called me a gypsy. I have desperately wanted my own home, where I never had to move again. A place I could renovate, plant trees in soil and put down roots.

Gypsy

My father in the last 10 years, while I’ve had my disability, has retired, slightly early to deal with bowel cancer, then bladder cancer. He has beaten both, a little worse for wear, but winning all the same and earlier this year he decided to sell his house. Not to downside, but for financial reasons he has upsized.

So, his house sold and the new house is not yet built and he’s renting for maybe 9 months in between. He’s not even renting far from the home I grew up in. He’s moving from 30 to 1/22, I know, insane!

I’m not sure how I am meant to feel about this. It has certainly bought up much emotional trauma for my mum who has clearly felt short changed for the last 25 years, since her divorce. I know, I’ve heard all about it, but while I feel a little sad, I don’t feel like I’m losing anything. If that make sense?

 

New home

Hot off the Press – 31st July 2017

Published July 31, 2017 by helentastic67

Hot off the Press 3107a

And another week has passed and I’m wondering what a Normal week should look like? Monday, saw my shrink. I do love the adventure of going to the city, doing a little hunter/gather and ticking a few mental things off my list.

Mondays

Ironically Tuesday crashed and burned, did not have a good day. The flattest, saddest day I’ve had for a while. Just couldn’t do Person, let alone adult or human-being.

Crash and burn

Sick of family not doing what they have committed to, some family not helping at all and other family forgetting I live alone without so much as a cat! They dump their attitude on me! Always makes me think of when some old lady(parent) cries that her beautiful son has died by their own hand and didn’t even have the decency to leave a note to say why? Seriously, going back to bed until I’ve had enough sleep so I can better deal with the day! (as the roadwork continues outside!)

Wednesday, comes together nicely despite no Young John to tease me and scoop me up and make my life easier. I actually scootered a bit on Monday, then got around by tram, train, lots of steps on my pedometer around the city before another tram ride home.

Wednesday

Thursday, roadworks a constant out on my street, I had a much nicer massage at home from my lovely Caroline. I made sure the rest of the day was very low key.

Thursday

Friday, a newish carer took me out shopping, no pet shops this week sadly. Tried to not stress out my new carer I’ve got for the next month of Fridays. She is young and some of her giggly humour reminds me of my younger sister. She has a little fresh wit I like from my carers.

Friday 1

Have been on the serious Provo-trail this last week or so attempting to save some money, or catch up on rent. A friend advised the best way to save money is to not buy food! What the? You heard!
So, I’ve contacted the two major not for profit welfare agencies. Yield? $60 of which I think the checkout chic may have kept $20 of it, as it did not come off my groceries and I still spent some of my rent. All the bills are paid and the healthy pills restocked. So, now to catch up on rent.

Friday night I was out for dinner with my Boo. Wait! I haven’t been hiding anything. My Boo (sweetheart name) is a I lovely gay friend, and I had been unable to convince our friend Damo to come out. We went to a Greek restaurant and while the entree was ok, the main was substituted for a more expensive option. Not going back there.

Greek menu

Really want to go visit George at Helenic Republic and not just because it has my name on it!
My Boo once worked for the likes of Gordon Ramsey but now works in the Disability sector. He politely informed them what we had ordered versus what they gave us. They looked at me as if my ‘Date’ was trying to show off and that I was dating the wrong guy. Nice, right? My gay friends are the straightest looking men you will ever meet and the benefits for me is I know they like spending time with me for my stela personality.

Have ticked off 5 plus comics this last week. I started a sixth but it got dark. Sunset is around 5.30 at the moment and it snuck up on me. Looking forward to the spring blossoms outside my bedroom window just around the corner. Don’t plan on moving until then. Not that I have seriously been looking.

Forwent the single girl date night this week as I was getting into a show I couldn’t stop watching. You probably realise I watch a great deal of TV, it’s my thing. It’s how I switch off my very busy brain. It’s what entertains me and often how I mark time passing. Sounds ridiculous but…… So, I’m always behind. The distraction this week I will describe as this; Netflix, Baz Lehrmann, the Bronx, Late 70’s Disco and the Black Music scene that later became Hip Hop. Think Beastie Boys but black and all the classic 70’s clothes, cars and graffiti. And then you have a show called the Get down. Only 11 episodes, the first 90 minutes long and the rest an hour each. I know some people won’t commit to watching a show unless it’s more than a season however I understand this show was so expensive to make they couldn’t do more than a season. Baz Luhrmann does a great job though you can never say he doesn’t. I think the soundtrack would be a must have. For something very different from Helen’s normal.

Get down

The weekend has ended with a rare but welcome visit from a friend who lives hours away, but when working in this part of Melbourne for a day will come and stay over at the Chateau de Helen. Have I mentioned I’m lucky I have a spare bedroom? Single bed but….better than nothing. Phillip, I’ve known for 20 years from when he and his wife owned a toy shop in my country town that I grew up in, at a time I lived back in that area for two years in the late 90’s.  His kids were just little kids then but now are all grown up. Phillip is often my tech-support and while I barely speak Apple he has a PC brain. There is lots of disrespect for Apple and lots of me telling his where to go. But between the two of us, we upgrade and de-bug my laptop! And he’s off to bed hours before me. So, here I am writing this post before I start my wind-down. Supper and a Cuppa T, I think and maybe I might make my curfew of 1am. Closer to 1 than 2 isn’t really getting 1am………but I’m trying.

Computer wiz

My left shoulder is hurting, I’ve obviously done something. I can’t feel a drag of the muscles over my shoulder and down the front of my neck. Think I’ll be asking my Chiro to tape it this week. She prompts how much/where? I will be suggesting she put layers down, pull it up and put it just everywhere, front and back of my left shoulder prompting a laugh from her. “Just put it everywhere!”

Shoulder

To another crazy adventurous week. Trying to get the digits up on the pedometer to make Young John proud.

And hoping I get that final follower to get me to 100, not that I get that much feedback in the form of Likes, I know I have my small number of serious followers who like and comment. To you few, luv your work!
Cheers,
H

Good week

Hot off the Press – 3rd July 2017

Published July 3, 2017 by helentastic67

Hot off the Press 030717

Another weird week has passed! Finished three comics and felt a moment of joy at this until I saw an advert for a Comic Con, in the States. The advert stating “Coming in September in 2015!” Growl!

Comic Con

Went out for dinner Tuesday night with some friends. Damo and my Boo. More later on Damo, however my Boo is one of my lovely gay friends who takes us out every now and again for adventures. We went to a ‘Place’ for dinner, prompting me to give people a pop quiz.

What suburb was this place in and what food did they specialise in? It was called Coburger and Co. Hint: There is a suburb in the North of Melbourne called Coburg. This pop quiz really threw a few people and they live here.

Coburger

It’s going to be a monthly adventure ongoing as it’s good to catch up with friends and have a laugh. My chicken burger with Kim chi set my mouth on Fire!

Wednesday for some crazy reason, I had a weird song in my head that I proceeded to share with Young John and Maria my Chiro who I’ve been seeing for over 12 years.

This song is a bit of an ear-worm so it quickly prompted her to thank me because she couldn’t get it out of her head either. Your welcome! Try the link at the bottom for a taste of Aussie/wog culture from the 80’s! As I prompted Young John….feel free to join in!

 

This week I decided to call my father. I only see him once a year. The only time I speak to him is if and when I call him. I attempted to express how much I needed his help. How I’ve spent money on new pants in time for winter ($24). How often I do my laundry so I can utilise my warmest tops. I even attempted to express how my fur-baby had been good for my mental health. Let me just say I used to be much better at guilting my father into helping me, because it would seem that’s my role in our family. I will also say it was half an hour of my life I will never get back!

Thought I would have a nice Thursday at home, but while I was at home I instead spent the afternoon chasing up services that didn’t just happen. Really wish my service providers would get their shit together to do their jobs.

Friday morning, I had a visit from a vampire. Taking my blood for a barrage of tests. Said vampire asked when I would see my GP again? It’s ok, if there’s anything noteworthy he will call me. Just checking up on the iron levels and such and the crazy lady hormones.

Vampire

Not sure if I’ve expressed sufficiently how cold my home is in winter or the cheek I have with my carers however, Friday I gave my carer the Coo-Wee! That signalled I was ready for her help in the bathroom and after a deafening silence I heard the doorbell. Not uncommon however Aunty Christine was in the house this day and she has been one of my regulars for over 4 years. So, only able to throw a towel over one shoulder I padded bare ass naked really to the front door to let her back in. Steam coming off my very warm body and prompting Aunty Christine that she was not yet ready for her apprenticeship to be done.

Doorbell

Come a September I lose these carers I’ve had for the longest. I don’t have any new girls who I imagine will take their place.

Had an extra visit to my favourite cafe with my Friday afternoon carer so that was nice. Home again and smashed out a large slow cooker batch of minestrone the yield was about 8 Passatta bottles (300mls each). It’s always nice to gift someone a bottle of soup in winter when they have done something nice for me. I’m such a Nonna. (BT Dubs, that’s an Italian Grandmother!) I now need to offload half of the minestrone so I can make a batch of bolognaise sauce. Have I mentioned I don’t know how to cook for just one?

Minestrone soup

Now, despite my best efforts at times at avoiding lifting my slow cooker there are times carers don’t turn up or I can’t find someone to lift the very heavy ceramic bowl up onto the bench or to the sink to soak before washing etc. I imagine I lifted it about five times, which is about half the amount of times it moved in order for me to use it and empty every last drop of the minestrone soup from it. I shouldn’t lift it at all obviously so I do love when I have a carer my age who complains about how heavy it is. I nip their cries in the bud quickly stating “Tell me about it. I moved it one-handed!”

Slow cooker

I don’t make a habit of lifting heavy things one handed anymore as I think I can blame doing this for my disc-bulge surgery back in 2011. There are times now when I forget how long that year was getting diagnosed, suitably medicated and eventually surgery on 11/11/11, when I get some stabbing sensation in my lower back and I realise I’ve got to stop lifting heavy things and I’m really not ready for another year existing only by spending all my time lying on my bed.

Single girl date night I watched Trainspotting 2, the sequel to the 90’s film Trainspotting. Not as shocking as the first but a 20-year reunion to see what happened to these characters.

trainspotting 2

Meanwhile, another week passes and a nice busy week coming. Winter in Melbourne and wet. Super!

Should mention the best way to survive winter in Melbourne is layers, layers and layers. Oh, wool jacket, umbrella and great coffee! Handy hint if coming to town! I’ve been wearing wool under my jackets for months, I can only go one further by wearing my long-sleeved wool jacket under my heavier jacket. It’s already next Level.

Melbourne weather

The only upside is the very brilliant TV series filmed in Melbourne called Offspring has returned. If you have the opportunity watch it!

Offspring

Cheers H

Have a great weekMelbourne

Hot off the Press – 26th June 2017

Published June 26, 2017 by helentastic67

Hot off the Press

Not much to bang on about for the week that was…….didn’t feel like I ‘kicked any goals’ so to speak.

My mum was down literally for only 24 hours in which time we drove several suburbs out of our way to get my new Dripolator coffee machine. Don’t ask……….Mum was actually down for a medical appointment of her own so once in the electrical goods store when mum mentioned where she was from and what she had come down to, (medical appointment) the staff murmured a noise of concern. (You know how woman do?) I cut the tone short by saying “It’s ok, she going to live forever!” Then they presumed I was not thrilled by this prospect. So, I had to dispel that also. I paid for my new medicine machine (coffee maker!) and mum of course stated she was there to carry it to the car. I growled at her that the box was full of plastic and air, as if she should stop complaining and because we always compete as to who gets the last word I snapped out; ” It’s because of me we get a carpark right next to the door!” I gave a coy smile to the startled staff and turned to head for the door. They laughed!

Dripolator

 

This is pretty stock standard of my mum and my level of communication. We don’t hold back if one of us things the other is deserving of a “Fuck off!” Or a “Whatever!” And it has taken 10 years for us to reach this point. Don’t be concerned, it’s a positive.

Sometimes I wonder how other bloggers go about ‘naming and shaming’ poor attitudes of family and friends and if they worry about backlash? But I understand my family might occasionally look at my blog but largely don’t bother. That said, I heard this week my younger sister (I’ll point out arrived just shy of my 15th birthday) is just starting 4 weeks of leave from her work. I offered she could come and visit a few days, we could hang out, go places, do things. Visit the Van Gogh exhibition at the NGV?

little sister

This quiet not confident offer was suggested on Facebook, the way distant family communicate. I was swiftly dealt a curt, “Nope!” I offered she could think about it a bit longer before deciding. Did I mention I changed this sibling’s nappies 28 years ago? And I see my sisters usually once a year.

Said younger sister, well deserving of her holiday. Not untrue, just doesn’t get my call for a visit and I couldn’t be bothered poking this bear. Leaving me a little sad. Does anyone else have a suggestion on how to prod family in a way I won’t have my one good hand bitten off?

And yes, like I mentioned I don’t think my family will read this since I have proof I have more Impact on people around the world from me than my own blood. Nothing like feeling like your living outside a family, trying to look in.

Feel free to give me a Like so I know you stopped by.

Otherwise, the week saw 2 comics move locations this week. No new posts written in pen on paper. A visit to the city to see my shrink. Did a workout (one-handed) on a photocopier of the next 40 posts to post to the lovely Noelle my Administrator.

Discovered my new favourite card shop in the city. Found completely on a whim, and was even able to replace my oven timer for baking accuracy. Didn’t realise how heavy it was until I got home. My bag was so heavy on Monday!

Kitchen timer

Got some big numbers on my pedometer this week. 4,444 – 5,739 and today a neat 69! My left foot is really paying for it. Often those busy days I can’t feel my left foot until it HURTS! So clearly not happy I still don’t have my NDIA funded shoes!

Had my once-yearly haircut this week, only 9 months overdue. I’ve given up paying rent on time and prioritised things I want/need instead. I asked my hairdresser for a discount on my trim (B.T. dubs:3 inches) and I’ve never felt so humiliated for being poor but wanting to be treated like everybody else. How dare I imagine I was allowed to? Left me feeling rather sad and sick and unpampered. (I didn’t get a wash or a blow dry and she was still put out for not respecting she was running a business) very sad face!

Hair cut

Still plenty of issues managing my HR, (Human Resources/carers) but it’s an ongoing issue.

Single girl date night saw me watch Underworld. Blood Wars. Mostly, I single tasked but it’s always a challenge………

Underworld

With the plunger coffee finally put to rest with the new medicine machine I posed the question of a few trusted advisors, plunger coffee or no coffee? In the same tone as bad sex or no sex? The answer was neither in case anyone asks?

Plunger

And then another week begins!

Lack of caffiene

Cheers,

H

Monday

 

Carer v Family – Part 2

Published May 31, 2017 by helentastic67

Carer

Carer v Family Part 2

I often find my carers are more…. How do I say this without offending family? Well, I don’t think I can, so I’ll just tear off the bandaid shall I?

My carer left today after shopping, calling out “Love You”, to which I replied; “Love You Too”.

Love you

The only male carer I have does my Homecare (cleaning) and my shopping, two things that don’t require him to see me naked and he is a beautiful young gay “thing” who engages with me all the way around the shopping complex and we converse about anything and everything.

He has been mistaken as my son and I think some people mistake us for a flirty couple. They are rude and disrespectful, then there’s the stalker type who notice him and stalk him. I don’t see or realise until he tells me later, but they love to come up to him and offer him their phone numbers.

Stalker

Seriously! Yuck! If I knew, I would give them some ‘what for’ and if that didn’t work, I would call the police on ‘000’!

If it were back in my club days, I would sort this shit out so easily.

But, anyway, my sweet young carer is going on holidays for a month now so I’ll truly miss him.

This is on the back of my mother being here for literally 24 hours to smash out some things. She left so late last night, she cranked me when she arrived home and it was after 1am.

I rang her tonight to say “thank you” and “I love you” and when she barely responded I told her I would imagine she had said it back to me.

Love you 2

She laughed!

It makes me so sad!

It makes me sadder still that soon, I’m going to lose all my friends. Friends that seem to care for me more than my own family.

Love you 3

Family – Part 2

Published March 13, 2017 by helentastic67

Family Pt 2

Family Part 2

I’ve been procrastinating this topic, because it’s not an easy topic to cover. I don’t know how other bloggers deal with this however, maybe I should be able to say what I like and if family can’t cope, they can start their own blog. However, what generally would happen would be that any assistance I currently have from family would quickly dry up.

We like to imagine that if someone is sick, has a disability or is dying (I’m not dying in case you’re wondering) empathy would kick in and any other ‘issues’ you have had with that person or family member, you would be the bigger person and put it aside, get over it or just move one.

I luckily, have both parents still on this plain, they are 66 and 67 which is younger than most of my friend’s parents. And they have not been together for the last twenty years.

I also have two surviving siblings. My family was rocked by severe grief when I was only 9 years old, when a younger sister died from cancer.

People don’t know how to deal with grief, so they stay away. Apparently ignoring a situation that makes people uncomfortable, makes it easier. So, our family pulled through and when I was a month shy of my 16th birthday there was another baby in the house.

There I was at 16, a full-time student, working a supermarket job, 15 hours a week (Yes! I was a checkout chick) and changing nappies and babysitting. And preparing (like there was any time) to spread my wings to move to study.

I should point out over Christmas, I had several jobs to help save for College.

This sister is now 28 and living back at home with my mum in the country.

It’s hard to bond with this sister as she has been raised by mum only from the age of 7 and while she moved out of home to study for a few years, she’s now back at home, working and saving for the things in your 20’s. Like travel.

I attempted to bond with her over GOT (Game of Thrones).

Game of Thrones

She watched the 1st season and decided she wanted to read the books, then mum decided to read the books before they would watch it together. And I’m out…

My older sister actually lives closest to me, about an hour away and I see her less than 5 times a year.

She and I lived together twice in my 20’s and to say it didn’t go well, would be an understatement. Other than I didn’t get a real job, I’m not completely sure what I did wrong to offend her, but when we are together, it’s hard…

Sisters

Family

Published February 23, 2017 by helentastic67

family-1

Family

I’m yet to unpack and draw a picture about my family and I’m getting there but things come up all the time so……

My Mum is my biggest supporter and occasionally my biggest critic, but Truly Ruely.

My Mum has been the only family who has been there when I’ve been in hospital and there is nothing worse than having my Mum look down at me with that look I recognise as “Oh my God Don’t let me watch another of my children die!”

sad-mum

And to be clear she gave me this look after my Disc bulge surgery. The nurse came in and felt she needed to remind me I could sue the morphine button. And the look my mum was giving me, having just seen my scar (covered in tape) and to let Mum know I was okay. I gave her the acronym STFU! The nurse looked started and my only interest was when I was allowed up to go pee. It was three days, I think! Three fucking days! I’m just saying. This once; THEY DON’T MAKE BEDPANS FOR WOMEN!

But more about my family soon.

family-2

Retrograde

Published August 12, 2016 by helentastic67

cat-bad-hair-day_12

Retrograde

Have a very bad case of procrastination now! And it’s partly because I just want to write about what’s happening in life now and partly because in order to have any of it make sense you need to know about what happened in the past. And as far as the post, I’m up to telling about some of the “hard parts”! So I guess were going RETROGRADE! Just for a little while!

And I might start by mentioning how important a woman’s hair is to her self-worth and her identity. And I mention this, perhaps (again) because it’s important…

My treatment, literally 20 (?) day’s ended on a Friday. On the weekend my partner (sorry, boyfriend) had his daughter with us and on the Sunday morning I got in the shower to wash my hair, so I could be presentable for an outing. We went to some typical ‘family’ adventure in Carlton and my scalp had been a little itchy around the hairline around the back.

I took my hair down, usually worn in a bun and I had matted bits. I pulled them out and got in the shower. I would normally brush it with conditioner in it. There was a corner part of the bath (shower over bath) where I could sit and as I brushed it, it kept coming out in my hands.

I don’t recall crying that day. I didn’t know how bad it was. I got out of the shower dried, dressed and put my hair up (wet).

Then I looked in the mirror!

No hair Helen

It was bad!

It was so obvious how much hair I’d lost, I had my boyfriend bring me my phone and I rang a friend. An old lady who lived in an old people’s village in the same suburb.

I had waited in the bathroom not wanting to scare my boyfriend’s daughter as she was about 4 years old!

I also didn’t know how to fashion/style the scarf, so she helped me with that also.

We went out and someone’s young daughter was looking at me oddly. I felt very self-conscious and I felt a little like the young girl thought I was a Muslim woman. (Not that there’s anything wrong with that!)

The Monday morning, I washed my hair again and this time I did cry. I also had the time to cry as well. And I got how Samantha from (SATC) had felt!

I wept!

That day, I texted my boyfriend and said simply ‘Hey Honey, can you buzz my hair off tonight?’ to which he simply replied ‘sure’ or ‘yes’ or whatever! And that is how I came to lean forward over the bathroom sink about once a month for six months until it started to grow back evenly.

When we had this routine our conversations went something like this;

Keeping in mind my boyfriend wore his hair as a Number one and was from the States and yet to get his permanent residency.

‘I wonder where the local recruitment office is’

To which I would answer;

They will take you before they take me!’

Oh, how we laughed!

What follows is a series of photos of my hair, or lack of and stages of it growing back.

I had pretty much stuck to the same hairstyle since I grew my hair out at about 16, so I really never thought to keep it short.

My bun and long hair had been my style ever since. I have curlier hair when it’s short and that translates to I hate curls!

Now about 8 years later I’m back to a once yearly haircut even if it means I have 4 inches off. I’m OK with that. Its reasonable low maintenance and I wash it on a Monday and Friday, my carers brushing it for me as I stand in the shower then they put it up for me. Sunday and Thursday being my messy hair days.

There are short bits around my temple and the back that drives me crazy another reason I don’t think short hair is for me…

Bad hair day

My anxiety would make me play with it a lot and I don’t need that. So, I figure.

Anyway, that’s enough about hair because when I complained about it to my nurse where I had my treatment she told me not to complain as I was ‘Lucky to have hair!’

I just wish I’d been told to get some hats! I was given a voucher of $50 for a wig and by the time that happened some of the side effects had kicked in and I didn’t have 2 working arms to put on a wig… If anyone has ever brought a wig or gone shopping for one, they would also tell you $50 is not going to help!

When I had no hair I really noticed old men sporting the comb-over hairdo! They really seemed to be more noticeable then. I wanted to go stand next to them and take off my hat and tell them;

comb-over

‘Let it go! It’s gone! The fights over!’