Not a Drinker

Published June 22, 2026 by helentastic67

Not a Drinker

Now, I do vehemently stand behind my statement that I barely drink, it’s very true despite the fact I have some serious alcohol in my home. Today I also went to a drive through bottle shop, also fondly referred to as a Bottle-O. Monday I bought some large jars and today I scooped up 2 Kilos of cumquats to make cumquat brandy. So, having a bottle of brandy at home already, I would be very annoyed if I started this process only to find I didn’t have enough brandy. I make a batch every few years as they need to marinade for four years. My oldest jar is about twenty years and its very dark I’m not wanting to need to crack that one open. I use the cumquats in my baking and the brandy is very nice in some lemonade, specifically Tarax Black Lemonade. It’s a nice Ladies drink, otherwise known as an aperitif. Explaining it like this, do I sound like a drinker?

It’s always much fun at a Bottle-O as I need to be directed to the brandy and they always show me their most expensive drop. I tell them I want the cheaper end of the market because when I’m done with it, it will be top shelf. The banter with the rather young male staff goes well and I mention while referring to my late-twenties carer I once went there for a small and cheap bottle of red wine to put in my bolognese and despite my carer being twenty, they asked her for ID, I asked today “Why don’t you ask the mid-life crazy ladies for ID?” I suggested while I’m not there for wine, they must see many hormonal women they just want to get them outta there with their wine.

Going to the post office I went to collect my two small parcels and I was offered five boxes of wine to which I swiftly replied, “No Thanks!”

So, circling back to my parting from the Bottle-O and my carer takes the purchase and calls back to me we can go. “Come on! Let’s go home and get drunk!” I laughed but hope he believed my version of our encounter. I do love the wit and humour of my carers, and their timing can be absolutely On-Point.

I’m Still Here and Making Pudding

Published January 11, 2026 by helentastic67

I’m Still Here and Making Pudding

Feeling really flat right now. You know those days it’s all too much and people that should love you don’t pick up what you’re putting down. It’s normally these days I don’t blog because I feel it’s a little too raw. So, I can’t make any good humour about things. Just appreciate I’m still here. I’m doing what I can, putting one foot in front of another planning to die healthy one day, a long time from now.

I’ll likely have more friends and beautifully kind people around me than those related to me. It’s weird at 53, the things I ended up being good at, even one-handed.

Last week I made two puddings the same day. Baked one that day, baked the other the next. Despite not all of Said-Puddings being out of my home, I made another this week. Some of the pudding after trying to deliver to its intended target, twice landed at the post office with the lovely ladies that always are kind and sweet to me. That’s not actually part of their job but I like to reward people with treats I make with love. Just for being who they are.

A friend took the time to visit yesterday while in Melbourne, was in my home while family dropped in for ten whole minutes. Five of which was spent criticizing me for my life choices, etc. She took me for dinner and while she then used public transport to get the two hours home, she kindly took some pudding and muled some to a friend that lives out near her.

Got feedback online late today from family about the expired used by dates on foodie treats, ungrateful the lot of them. No thanks for the delicious lemon tart I considered to get for them from my favourite cafe, costing me more than $10, I got myself one also and shared it with my friend.

I got a message from my friend tonight simply stating feedback on the bread-and-butter pudding. We had touched base earlier today about her arriving safely home and her car starting. For once I got to bed before she got home. Her feedback simply stating, “Your pudding was divine!”

If I could have everything else in life be as easy and productive as my pudding production, I would be a very happy woman. But none of that it seems in in my control.

About a month ago I arrived at my beauticians with a small container of my pudding and I put it in her hands at her front door. She works from home, she exclaimed immediately “It’s still warm!” I told her to take it to her kitchen and eat a spoonful. She came back a minute later with the washed container in her hands. She had inhaled it, then she stated she had half in one spoonful and she couldn’t leave the rest. Never is there a better compliment.

So, can I tell humans related to me if they can’t eat something with a lot of sugar in it, past its used by date to toughen up and eat some concrete. Asking for a friend?

New Hellonwheels

Published September 1, 2025 by helentastic67

New Hellonwheels

Have I mentioned I’m getting a new Hellonwheels this year? I know I haven’t. I’ve been too busy sorting the permanent housing or garaging and powering location for it in a communal garage.

To be fair, I had asked my support coordinator before I moved back in November 2024 if she could help sort these things before I moved so I would not be without the use of my scooter. The best time of year to be out and about on my scooter is summer. I literally had to pester my support coordinator to assist me with this task. In the end she did neither of those things. Support or coordinate.

I received a text with a company name who helped with this issue and the comment that they were expensive. I have never been angrier. Or so I thought.

At my previous address and all previous addresses over the last 15 years, I had been storing my scooter in a shed that had been funded for me by my first OT and over time it was a method of great importance and security to maintaining some independence for allowing me to get to local appointments without the assistance of carers or doing some hunter/gathering solo, to get ahead of when I did have carers for limited times.

When I moved, I concentrated on the things inside my new home. I don’t know if you have ever moved one-handed, but I’m limited by weight and size. For something without ADHD when I move homes I find I am always moving around, moving things from one location to another until everything settles to where I can best store, access or use it one-handed. Somethings only I can put away as I need to be able to get it out again if nobody else is around. Somethings that worked in my previous home may not work here.

I lagged in storing my belongings in my storage cage because I had to wait for my handyman to bring bolt cutters. I wanted to have him cover the inside with black plastic. to keep prying eyes from my belongings, my gardening supplies and my boxes of bits. Don’t need to explain that I hope. I was not allowed to erect my shed in my car space because its height got in the way of the sprinkler system and storing my scooter there was redundant as there was no power supply I could access and all the other fucking things.

I had been so busy sorting inside my home, I had implemented the theory of Schrodingers Cat to the belongings in my car space.

My neighbour who has the car-space beside me informed me my belongings had been rummaged through. When I checked I found a transformer for my scooter had been stolen. What the actual F. Do I need to finish this sentence?

At least this meant I poked my handyman to sort out the things by stopping ‘Mr get these things away’ And then…

Moving Target

Published June 17, 2024 by helentastic67

Moving Target

I often use the term each day as a Moving Target and I use this in the context that every day is a moving target. By the end of each day, I need to be in less pain, be less tired by the end of the day, have chiseled things on my mental to do list. Have eaten three meals a day. This rarely happens, FYI, I’m ok if it’s two meals and a coffee. My day revolves more around getting sleep, getting to appointments and home again, plus meals or sustenance slots in around these things.

More importantly, I encounter less people I want to kill or deserve to be killed. Harsh words I know. Not advocating to be set loose with free rein here. Not killed anyone yet. Don’t intend to start, but I also limit myself around people and groups that piss me off. Also, the most important thing every day is to get through the day without a migraine. Can we do just that?

Everyday life seems to throw challenges in my face to make that nearly impossible and if I do these things in the earlier part of the day. What will I not be able to do later in the day? It’s always either/or never both.

Merry Christmas from Hellonwheels

Published December 24, 2023 by helentastic67

Merry Christmas from Hellonwheels

It’s that tough pointy end of the year again and I’m in a battle of Tetris-Like levels with my fridge and only me to eat it.

A conversation with my cousin on my birthday at the end of October instilled in me, I would be very happy to be able to sleep for the whole week of Christmas, eat and catch up on TV.

Here’s to staying home alone, where I don’t lose my independence and I already know I’m going to be spending time alone. Its weirdly better than being around family, but still being all alone.

I might even be able to talk a carer into making me a ham and cheese toasties and putting it on my bedside table.

Here’s to an easier 2024 and for December not to fly around so quickly. So say all of us.

A Rare Sunday

Published March 6, 2023 by helentastic67

A Rare Sunday

Only yesterday, Saturday I was included in an invite for a lunch gathering with my lovely Young John. The last year or so I haven’t seen much of him and for years he was like the only person I reached out to every week, he’s a busy man and has made time for own health in recent years.

If you are not sure or a new follower Young John is my lovely Greek taxi driver who has been driving taxis for forty plus years and was screwed over by the Uber/taxi license debacle of years past. He started driving me to rehab/physio appointments around fifteen years ago. Car-pooling myself and others generally older than me to all kinds of appointments. Young John is someone who in a day drives all over Melbourne scooping up regular people he has been driving for a lifetime and I’ve been lucky to have met him when I have. He always squeezes me into his schedule when he can.

Honestly, Young Betty was up from 6am (sleep in for her) but cooking like only a Yia-Yia or Nonna can. Do. When anyone else would do a lasagna or meat and salad for a BBQ or some roasted vegetables on the site. A Ya-Ya does it all.

I learnt years ago if you finish your plate as my upbringing taught me a Nonna will assume you loved it and are still hungry. Once had my aunt (the Italian Nonna) give me three serves of her food. Delicious that it was, the third time I didn’t eat it all as it was the only way for her to know I really couldn’t eat anymore.

Young Betty worked her way around the table deriving us and she passed behind my chair I told her I was not going to start until she sat and stayed down. Also, a sign of respect from my white Aussie upbringing, but often frowned upon by the European elders.

Finished with cuppa chino and some cake. I helped clear the table and shared the very amusing anecdote about packing dishes styles someone shared with me this week.

Nonsense, Older Peoples Conversations

Published August 15, 2022 by helentastic67

Nonsense Older Peoples Conversation

Lately I’ve completely nailed how to get the most from my conversations with old people and if you want to know? Just keep reading…

In recent years I’ve timed my outreach calls to my father by booking it every two weeks. I call one fortnight and he is to call me the next. If he doesn’t, I will prompt him with a text… “Your turn!”

Recently, my beautician has mentioned she misses the nonsense old people conversations, so now I call him on speaker when I’m with her being tortured. It starts off dad being rather anxious. My beautician uses a few Italian words here and there which he often needs reminding what she is referring to. It’s a part of his memory he doesn’t use much. My beautician is often hungry as I’ll arrive too early and she has yet to eat.

She asks my dad if he’s had lunch? His response… “I had a sort of salad sandwich!” I hold up a finger to indicate for her to wait. She tells me to let him go. I interrupt him because I smell a rat, please define this word “sort of” and “salad?” I will cut to the chase, there was neither “sort of, nor salad”.

What he had was a very tasty sandwich which was fried chorizo on bread. A great treat I hope he’s not having every day.

Later in the conversation, beautician getting hungry enough to threaten to hit one of us; and not wanting it to be me, we stop talking food. We will mention this myth “sort-of-salad” in a teasing way and we all have a good laugh. In the end he usually tells us when he’s had enough. Beautician laughs and informs him he’s her favourite of my parents.

It’s turned out to be the highlight of my treatments. My torture is in the form of electrolysis to my face. Originally, it was to fix the damage from years on steroids for brain swelling, now it’s for my crazy hormones. I’m not going to be in the nursing home with a beard.

Today’s Lunch – 30th October 2019

Published October 30, 2019 by helentastic67

Today’s Lunch

Good Mental Health Day

This week’s post is all about the food! Food of the gods maybe, and the reason for food and celebrating is because last week I was 46 and now I’m a whole year older. I’m never super happy around my birthday. Not complaining about getting older. The other option is not to be here and it’s not an option. It’s just being alone brings up all kinds of issues and loneliness. Family usually get together to eat amazing food somewhere but I’m always left feeling a bit underwhelmed.

Sunday went to Hellenic Republic in Brunswick! (It’s got my name on it!) It’s the restaurant owned by the recently departed master chef judge George Columbaris (he didn’t die btw!) It’s modern Greek food. So good!

We start with dips and bread, olives, some salads and two slow cooked meats, including a lamb shoulder apparently for two, but we have so much to choose from we share between five! Not to mention Saganaki and haloumi cheese. Rolled home to have Hummingbird cake. I request it from time to time and my mum makes it. Was so happy I skipped dinner, had a big beck’s mug of water instead.

On my birthday, got to have late lunch with my lovely masseuse Caroline. Went to a cool hipster cafe in Northcote called Tinker. And had this hot cake with Persian fairy-floss on top. Caroline was very impressed with my efforts to finish it. Repeat of last night’s dinner.

And today, back at my favourite cafe in Fitzroy North. I’ve always thought it was in Clifton Hill but all this time I’ve been wrong. Recent weeks has seen me not make it here but today I skipped something to be here. Thought I’d concentrate on my once a year slice of this amazing goodness. I call it the Salted chocolate thing, thing, thing! Because I forget it’s called the ……………Montalbano.

This was after a very healthy lunch of pancetta quiche with side salad and medicine!

Then I’ve got a photo shoot here later! To be continued……..

Cheers H

Home

Published July 22, 2019 by helentastic67

Home

Oh! Going to write about something a bit different today, despite the backlog, I’ve got to catch up on.

Was having a conversation with my Lady Girl-Friday earlier. She’s one of my carers that is often mistaken as my daughter.

We were discussing travel and the mentality of when you travel. I should point out she has travelled to New Zealand on a typical ‘young-person’ travel holiday and then with her Oma (Dutch for Grandmother) to Holland for a slightly longer period of time.

My only real overseas holiday dates back to (wait for it) 1994, with my first serious boyfriend (I will circle back to this later) Needless to say, I don’t mention him in current time so, plot-spoiler, it didn’t end well. Most of the three months, I went to the UK for a visit with a whole week in Europe (two days in Paris, two days in Rome and two days in Florence).

So, it’s safe to say our experiences were very different. However, I made the point that when you travel, it’s great to be somewhere different, see different things, places, cultures, languages and the food. Oh my God the food.

But, if you are in one place for a few weeks, you will likely go out and find a café. You will also keep going back to that café because you can quickly get to be known as a regular. If you are trying to not spend too much money, it’s not a huge expense, it gets you out of the ‘house’. I spent my first month staying in a place about an hour from London while the boyfriend waited for his ‘interest payment’ to come through so he had his spending money. So, even on a holiday, we crave a place that makes us feel like home.

Happy Stupid Millennials

Published June 7, 2019 by helentastic67

Happy Stupid Millennial’s

Today, I was down in Collingwood where I rarely go these days and after I saw something that rather pissed me off. I got to do something that made me happy, then very quickly grumpy.

Firstly, I saw a young Millennial take a bite of something out of a paper bag, crumble up the bag and throw it behind her into the gutter.

To be perfectly clear, I would have handled this scenario the same way twenty years ago, or even fifteen years ago before my disability. This shit is like a red flag to a bull, to me. I motioned to her to stop. I told her to go back and pick it up and that there would be a bin around her somewhere and go put it in the bin. This makes me happy to growl at the ‘younger people’.

Then she completely ignored me, walked past me back into the shop she likely got it from, to get something else, that she didn’t do as I suggested, pissed me off even more.